I run my best when I am annoyed and frustrated. I push myself harder when I feel like I have something that is weighing on my mind. I feel better after I run knowing that I accomplished the task and knowing that I did what I set out to do.
These last couple months have brought about many days of annoyance and frustration. Days when I questioned my abilities to be who I am, do what I am doing and not feel guilt or regret for choices I have made. There have been days when I turn to friends or TGIM for support and encouragement and days when those people have turned to me.
Living away from my supportive counterparts and only having TGIM here to lean on can become tiresome and I am sure it leaves him reeling sometimes. I yearn for the company of my girl friends who call and say, "Hey let's do lunch!" and on a whim we are chatting it up over vegetarian cuisine. Those days have long since passed and instead I find that I have dove into this running thing head first to take my mind off the fact that I feel just as alone and friendless here in Florida as the day I crossed over the state line to make this my home.
The difference is today I can walk into a public place and perhaps see a familiar face. I can smile and say hi and then that meeting is complete. The people I do have down here that I call my "friends" are incredible, wonderful people. But, if my Brooks Adrenlines would carry me, I'd run my ass back to Michigan in heartbeat and into the warm embrace of those stellar companions I left behind and so desperately miss.
Today's plan is to push myself again to try to get under 11 minutes running....Fingers crossed I will get there.
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